So I have a fun story to share.
I've been talking w/ a friend tonight (my roommate's boyfriend). He mentioned that someone told him when they found out he was my roommate's boyfriend that they were impressed my roommate "bagged the prize" lol
My response to that was like this...
James,
I would never consider a person to be a prize. it's the relationship that's a prize. What you and austin have is a prize and from what I can see the two of you are amazing together.
Relationships, however, no matter their greatness are not without obstacles. Sadly, sometimes, those obstacles are impossible to overcome. It made me think about what I used to have with Rob. I've had people tell me I've yet to experience love, and what I had with him wasn't. Well they're flat wrong. However, it did make me realize what I had was a prize. not the person but the relation. However, it was the obstacles that we just could'nt get over in the end that killed us.
It wasn't me, I put in so much effort...too much effort; when he put in absolutely none. Getting over hurdles with him was like trying to do a potato sack race with an unconscious 500 pound gorilla. It was just too much weight for me to carry over on my own and it had to end.
So for anyone in a relationship don't give up over little stuff. You have to work at it and for god sake try really hard not to become another statistic in the, "didn't realize what I had until it was gone" category. I knew what I had though. he didn't and he regretted it for a long time. I don't think he does so much anymore but honestly every time I see him I can just see it in his eyes that he's completely unhappy and lonely. Don't make that mistake.
Love you all and good reading.
-Rob
Monday, May 26, 2008
Splash
As usual splash was this weekend, and of course not without it's drama. Needless to say I had a great time though. It started friday night. I went out to the club with Matt and Kris and saw a lot of familiar faces. Then spent the night at Craig's and saturday morning, woke up and headed out to the lake.
So I suppose I'll start with the dramatic parts:
We get out there and to my suprise I didn't see Joe, or Roger and James. After asking around Eric told me that apparently Joe had bronchitis, which didn't explain roger and james not being there but oh well. I wasn't able to camp out for the weekend like usual b/c I had to work today and Joe usually goes out all three days and stays out. There would have been no way for me to get back to the marina. So late saturday afternoon, Joe, Roger and James showed up in their boats and pulled in and anchored. after a while joe came over to visit the boats I was on and when I went to ask how he was doing he said, "stay away from me." My first thought was that he didn't want to pass off any germs....but then I asked, "is it the bronchitis?" he said, no, and that he didn't want to talk to me. I'm like, wtf...
so anyway we have had our problems in the past but I honestly have no clue what brought this on. needless to say though I was kindof upset. Not long after that I check my phone and it has a text from Joe... it said, "that's the last time I invite you anywhere"...
well to be honest I was pretty insulted, first he tells me not to talk to him like I'm some sort of drugged up whore, then he bitches at me for not coming on the boat this weekend...well, I responded in kind.
I told him to go fuck himself. he had obviously deleted my number b/c he responded with, "who is this" even though I'm sure he knew exactly who it was. Well, you know what Joe, fuck you again. Last time he had his man-period he did this. well, this time I can play too. So I deleted his number and blocked him on every site I know him on. So honestly, I'm finally doing what I should have done ages ago, disconnecting from him completely. He is an ass and has done nothing but take from me without giving anything in return.
There was plenty more drama, sunday night I thought my iphone was at the bottom of the lake but it turned out I had left it on the boat and my friend Jack gave it back to me later <3. That turned out good. Let's see....sunday Craig's boat wouldn't start....that kinda sucked and I felt bad for him b/c I know he really wanted to go. I guess the only other thing was sat night.
My ex Rob was there and we were getting ready to pull away from the cove to go home. David H, our mutual friend, was looking for him so they could swim back to shore but he couldn't find him. We looked everywhere but no sign. The last place anyone saw him was on the boat from Dallas called Naughty Boys...who's owners are famous for their shady escort business. So needless to say everyone was pretty worried, but Craig had to get the boat back to the dock so we left....
well when I asked Rob about it just now he said mine, and everyone elses concern was irrational b/c we had no reason to worry...well, he's kind of an ass hole but whatever...that's pretty much it on the drama....
The fun things:
So saturday night on the way back Kris and I decided to ride the tube back to the marina. lol...oops...it was so choppy that the 20+ minute ride left me bruised and scraped..but it was so much fun. there was one point when we were both completely airborne. lol.
saturday night I went to the clubs with David and Jeff. Two really really cute boys from dallas and we had a lot of fun. I really like david...too bad he doesn't live here. :(
I also had a blast in general spending time with Craig, Kris, and Matt. I hope to do it again soon.
Today I worked and met David and Jeff for a movie and drinks at 2 b/c my boss let me leave early b/c it is a holiday.
I can safely say that all in all it was a pretty good weekend. Let me know what you thought of it if you were there!!
So I suppose I'll start with the dramatic parts:
We get out there and to my suprise I didn't see Joe, or Roger and James. After asking around Eric told me that apparently Joe had bronchitis, which didn't explain roger and james not being there but oh well. I wasn't able to camp out for the weekend like usual b/c I had to work today and Joe usually goes out all three days and stays out. There would have been no way for me to get back to the marina. So late saturday afternoon, Joe, Roger and James showed up in their boats and pulled in and anchored. after a while joe came over to visit the boats I was on and when I went to ask how he was doing he said, "stay away from me." My first thought was that he didn't want to pass off any germs....but then I asked, "is it the bronchitis?" he said, no, and that he didn't want to talk to me. I'm like, wtf...
so anyway we have had our problems in the past but I honestly have no clue what brought this on. needless to say though I was kindof upset. Not long after that I check my phone and it has a text from Joe... it said, "that's the last time I invite you anywhere"...
well to be honest I was pretty insulted, first he tells me not to talk to him like I'm some sort of drugged up whore, then he bitches at me for not coming on the boat this weekend...well, I responded in kind.
I told him to go fuck himself. he had obviously deleted my number b/c he responded with, "who is this" even though I'm sure he knew exactly who it was. Well, you know what Joe, fuck you again. Last time he had his man-period he did this. well, this time I can play too. So I deleted his number and blocked him on every site I know him on. So honestly, I'm finally doing what I should have done ages ago, disconnecting from him completely. He is an ass and has done nothing but take from me without giving anything in return.
There was plenty more drama, sunday night I thought my iphone was at the bottom of the lake but it turned out I had left it on the boat and my friend Jack gave it back to me later <3. That turned out good. Let's see....sunday Craig's boat wouldn't start....that kinda sucked and I felt bad for him b/c I know he really wanted to go. I guess the only other thing was sat night.
My ex Rob was there and we were getting ready to pull away from the cove to go home. David H, our mutual friend, was looking for him so they could swim back to shore but he couldn't find him. We looked everywhere but no sign. The last place anyone saw him was on the boat from Dallas called Naughty Boys...who's owners are famous for their shady escort business. So needless to say everyone was pretty worried, but Craig had to get the boat back to the dock so we left....
well when I asked Rob about it just now he said mine, and everyone elses concern was irrational b/c we had no reason to worry...well, he's kind of an ass hole but whatever...that's pretty much it on the drama....
The fun things:
So saturday night on the way back Kris and I decided to ride the tube back to the marina. lol...oops...it was so choppy that the 20+ minute ride left me bruised and scraped..but it was so much fun. there was one point when we were both completely airborne. lol.
saturday night I went to the clubs with David and Jeff. Two really really cute boys from dallas and we had a lot of fun. I really like david...too bad he doesn't live here. :(
I also had a blast in general spending time with Craig, Kris, and Matt. I hope to do it again soon.
Today I worked and met David and Jeff for a movie and drinks at 2 b/c my boss let me leave early b/c it is a holiday.
I can safely say that all in all it was a pretty good weekend. Let me know what you thought of it if you were there!!
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
gay boys are so fickle
I'm not going to sit here an put myself on a pedestal and I'm not trying to toot my own horn so keep that in mind when you read the rest of this...
It seems all too common that I hear from some cute guy, "I really like you rob." I'm not talking the friendship like...the context is usually something more serious. It seems though, that every time I hear those words they never pan out. Am I doing something wrong here?
Ok, so back up. Last night I'm in the midst of an SMS conversation with the guy I've been telling you about. He mentioned kissing me the other day and apologized for being so flakey...I can understand the flakiness, he's going through a stressful time right now....but don't apologize for it if you have no intentions of correcting it....it's like spitting on a forrest fire, the effort is moot and pointless. So he tells me he likes me and wants to see me and blah blah blah...I've heard it all before. So this morning, more SMS-ing, and he promises to "text" me later to hang out. To be frank, I haven't invested any emotion into this one at all, so I'm not so much upset, but more confused I guess. Anyway 10:30 pm rolls around and finally a text, "hey I'm at dinner with {} and []". Ok, that's nice...but I'm soon to be going to bed, and "hanging out" for me means before 10 pm. I guess I shouldn't complain, he did fulfill his promise.
Correct me if I'm wrong but is it too much to ask that someone follow through with what they say they are going to do. I mean, he just finished going on and on about liking me and how he's going to text me so we can hang out and then waits until I'm about to go to bed to tell me he's just now sitting down for dinner...WTF is that?!?
Someone please tell me why this crap seems to keep happening. I mean, ok besides the fact that I seem to consistently pick flakey immature boys to pursue. Am I expecting too much from people? is that it? I honestly don't feel that requiring someone to make good on their word in at least a relatively timely manner....and not hours and hours after expected to do so, is all that much to ask do you? Is it too much to demand a little respect? I guess so.
Well anyway enough of my rant about someone who I supposedly, "didn't put emotional investment in" lol. And if you think this is bad...trust me, this is mature thoughtful Rob. Last time I had a crush I WAY WAY WAY over invested and it did just that...crushed me. lol.
So I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do this weekend. I'm supposed to be on a boat with some other friends, including the guy mentioned above. I may end up skipping though and hang out with my good friend Clay who is back in Austin and whom I miss very very much. (He moved to NYC back in January). Either way I'm sure there will be some great stories to share and I will be sure to do so.
Until then make sure to keep it real...and follow through with your commitments for all our sakes...
Love,
Rob
It seems all too common that I hear from some cute guy, "I really like you rob." I'm not talking the friendship like...the context is usually something more serious. It seems though, that every time I hear those words they never pan out. Am I doing something wrong here?
Ok, so back up. Last night I'm in the midst of an SMS conversation with the guy I've been telling you about. He mentioned kissing me the other day and apologized for being so flakey...I can understand the flakiness, he's going through a stressful time right now....but don't apologize for it if you have no intentions of correcting it....it's like spitting on a forrest fire, the effort is moot and pointless. So he tells me he likes me and wants to see me and blah blah blah...I've heard it all before. So this morning, more SMS-ing, and he promises to "text" me later to hang out. To be frank, I haven't invested any emotion into this one at all, so I'm not so much upset, but more confused I guess. Anyway 10:30 pm rolls around and finally a text, "hey I'm at dinner with {} and []". Ok, that's nice...but I'm soon to be going to bed, and "hanging out" for me means before 10 pm. I guess I shouldn't complain, he did fulfill his promise.
Correct me if I'm wrong but is it too much to ask that someone follow through with what they say they are going to do. I mean, he just finished going on and on about liking me and how he's going to text me so we can hang out and then waits until I'm about to go to bed to tell me he's just now sitting down for dinner...WTF is that?!?
Someone please tell me why this crap seems to keep happening. I mean, ok besides the fact that I seem to consistently pick flakey immature boys to pursue. Am I expecting too much from people? is that it? I honestly don't feel that requiring someone to make good on their word in at least a relatively timely manner....and not hours and hours after expected to do so, is all that much to ask do you? Is it too much to demand a little respect? I guess so.
Well anyway enough of my rant about someone who I supposedly, "didn't put emotional investment in" lol. And if you think this is bad...trust me, this is mature thoughtful Rob. Last time I had a crush I WAY WAY WAY over invested and it did just that...crushed me. lol.
So I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do this weekend. I'm supposed to be on a boat with some other friends, including the guy mentioned above. I may end up skipping though and hang out with my good friend Clay who is back in Austin and whom I miss very very much. (He moved to NYC back in January). Either way I'm sure there will be some great stories to share and I will be sure to do so.
Until then make sure to keep it real...and follow through with your commitments for all our sakes...
Love,
Rob
Sunday, May 18, 2008
What a week
sigh...I'm glad it's over.
Where to start. I suppose it wasn't this week but last week when I found out that my dad has T-cell lymphoma. Not entirely sure of the extent to which he has it but we should hear from the doctor within a few more weeks. He's pretty optimistic as is the doctor so I guess I'm not entirely worried but needless to say it's hard news to take.
On monday this week we went through a round of layoffs at work. It's been a pretty hectic week in that regard trying to figure out exactly how to restructure our team to cover the entire plate of responsibilities with one less person. Interestingly enough it ended up giving me more responsibilities and program ownership that actually involves what I went to school for. Basically we ended up losing an environmental person. So we are now down to 4 including me which means I am now changing responsibilities. My old responsibilities are being delegated out among the staff and I will be the new lead on Air Emissions, Storm Water, Industrial Wastewater, and Risk Management. I'm excited about it but it is definitely going to be a large learning curve to overcome. I figured I'd have at least this coming week to move my stuff to my new office in Oak Hill, but my boss informed me friday morning that I needed to be moved by monday afternoon.
With that being said Austin and I have also decided to move away from downtown. It's just too expensive and in an effort to save some money for a house we are going to be looking at renting a house in Southwest Austin somewhere. We found some houses twice the square footage of our apartment for about $600 a month less. which will help me start saving money. Not to mention I'll be a lot closer to work so I'll be spending less in gas. Either way you slice it there are obviously some big changes coming up.
So I know I promised you an update on that guy...there isn't much to give sadly. Nothing really has changed which is fine with me, but if it keeps up at this pace to be honest I'm going to get a little frustrated. I figured I'll give it a week or so and if it doesn't seem to be going anywhere then I'll have to say something.
Anyway that's about it for now...until next time...cao
Where to start. I suppose it wasn't this week but last week when I found out that my dad has T-cell lymphoma. Not entirely sure of the extent to which he has it but we should hear from the doctor within a few more weeks. He's pretty optimistic as is the doctor so I guess I'm not entirely worried but needless to say it's hard news to take.
On monday this week we went through a round of layoffs at work. It's been a pretty hectic week in that regard trying to figure out exactly how to restructure our team to cover the entire plate of responsibilities with one less person. Interestingly enough it ended up giving me more responsibilities and program ownership that actually involves what I went to school for. Basically we ended up losing an environmental person. So we are now down to 4 including me which means I am now changing responsibilities. My old responsibilities are being delegated out among the staff and I will be the new lead on Air Emissions, Storm Water, Industrial Wastewater, and Risk Management. I'm excited about it but it is definitely going to be a large learning curve to overcome. I figured I'd have at least this coming week to move my stuff to my new office in Oak Hill, but my boss informed me friday morning that I needed to be moved by monday afternoon.
With that being said Austin and I have also decided to move away from downtown. It's just too expensive and in an effort to save some money for a house we are going to be looking at renting a house in Southwest Austin somewhere. We found some houses twice the square footage of our apartment for about $600 a month less. which will help me start saving money. Not to mention I'll be a lot closer to work so I'll be spending less in gas. Either way you slice it there are obviously some big changes coming up.
So I know I promised you an update on that guy...there isn't much to give sadly. Nothing really has changed which is fine with me, but if it keeps up at this pace to be honest I'm going to get a little frustrated. I figured I'll give it a week or so and if it doesn't seem to be going anywhere then I'll have to say something.
Anyway that's about it for now...until next time...cao
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
So I met someone...
So I wanted to give you an update. I met someone...well actually I didn't just meet them really...I have actually known him for quite sometime.
He's very cute and very smart, and funny, easy to talk to ...pretty much just amazing.... I've known him for a while through some mutual friends and I guess just a few weeks ago at splash was when I really hung out with him a little more. So we seem to have hit it off. Last weekend we spent a lot of time together and we went to a movie sunday night. I'm not really sure what to think of it yet but I'll def keep you posted. At this point I can't say yea or nea to dating him. I just need to explore the situation. I think he likes me and I like him, I just don't want to jump into anything. It's been a hectic year so far and as I'm about to explain...it's going to get worse...
Work:
So work has been pretty hectic, I'm just now coming into my new role and despite the challenges things have finally reached a steady state....well until yesterday
I got to work in the morning and I had a page from my boss that read:
"FYI, AUSS/EHS is having a round of layoffs this morning, I just want to let you know that we have finished and I plan to meet with everyone this afternoon to discuss the impact to our team"
Well in short AUSS/EHS is our organization/department at Freescale. It turned out to be one of my fellow environmental coworkers. It's a big disappointment and I'm sad to see her go but there isn't anything I can do bout it. Sadly these things happen. I met with my boss today to discuss how that would impact me. We have gone from 5 to 4 environmental team members and I am one of them. Up until now most of my responsibilities have not been at all related to my degree...that's changing soon. I've been managing Austin wide responsibilities while commuting between my two offices. I will no officially inherit the Air, Wastewater, and Storm Water programs at the Oak Hill Site. This means I will be permanently moving my office there and I have to divide up my current responsibilities among the rest of the staff.
This poses a unique challenge as I now have an ENORMOUS learning curve to overcome, several thousand environmental regulations to be familiar with, and three new programs of compliance to learn. This drastically increases my responsibility and liability for my actions. If I fuck up, the factory gets shut down...that's a big weight to carry but I'm excited...and if you were wondering...that is going to be my arguing point for a promotion/raise coming here in the next few weeks with my mid-year PM review.
It will def be interesting to see where things go. I'm glad I get to work at Oak Hill as it is a more social environment and the staff is closer and all friends with each other. The only sad things are is 1. I lost a friend, and 2. due to other layoffs the cutest guy in the whole Oak Hill office is now moving to Ed Bluestein :( oh well...
So I guess that's about it for now. I'll be working my life away for the next few months to get into the swing of things so don't expect much out of me for a while..
until then happy hunting!
Love
Rob
He's very cute and very smart, and funny, easy to talk to ...pretty much just amazing.... I've known him for a while through some mutual friends and I guess just a few weeks ago at splash was when I really hung out with him a little more. So we seem to have hit it off. Last weekend we spent a lot of time together and we went to a movie sunday night. I'm not really sure what to think of it yet but I'll def keep you posted. At this point I can't say yea or nea to dating him. I just need to explore the situation. I think he likes me and I like him, I just don't want to jump into anything. It's been a hectic year so far and as I'm about to explain...it's going to get worse...
Work:
So work has been pretty hectic, I'm just now coming into my new role and despite the challenges things have finally reached a steady state....well until yesterday
I got to work in the morning and I had a page from my boss that read:
"FYI, AUSS/EHS is having a round of layoffs this morning, I just want to let you know that we have finished and I plan to meet with everyone this afternoon to discuss the impact to our team"
Well in short AUSS/EHS is our organization/department at Freescale. It turned out to be one of my fellow environmental coworkers. It's a big disappointment and I'm sad to see her go but there isn't anything I can do bout it. Sadly these things happen. I met with my boss today to discuss how that would impact me. We have gone from 5 to 4 environmental team members and I am one of them. Up until now most of my responsibilities have not been at all related to my degree...that's changing soon. I've been managing Austin wide responsibilities while commuting between my two offices. I will no officially inherit the Air, Wastewater, and Storm Water programs at the Oak Hill Site. This means I will be permanently moving my office there and I have to divide up my current responsibilities among the rest of the staff.
This poses a unique challenge as I now have an ENORMOUS learning curve to overcome, several thousand environmental regulations to be familiar with, and three new programs of compliance to learn. This drastically increases my responsibility and liability for my actions. If I fuck up, the factory gets shut down...that's a big weight to carry but I'm excited...and if you were wondering...that is going to be my arguing point for a promotion/raise coming here in the next few weeks with my mid-year PM review.
It will def be interesting to see where things go. I'm glad I get to work at Oak Hill as it is a more social environment and the staff is closer and all friends with each other. The only sad things are is 1. I lost a friend, and 2. due to other layoffs the cutest guy in the whole Oak Hill office is now moving to Ed Bluestein :( oh well...
So I guess that's about it for now. I'll be working my life away for the next few months to get into the swing of things so don't expect much out of me for a while..
until then happy hunting!
Love
Rob
Monday, May 05, 2008
Splash
Well I must say this splash was a lot of fun. it wasn't nearly as crowded but I still had a blast. Spent the first day on the boat with Kris, Rob, Eugene, Matt, and Craig. It was nice to get to hang out with Rob Con, I hadn't seen him in ages and although it was tense/awkward at first spirits seemed to lighten up as the day went on. I had a long talk with Joe and things seemed to clear up at least. I'm glad we aren't mad at each other but it's still going to be a challenge to define our friendship in a way we both enjoy/benefit.
I had a great time hanging out with Kris, and matt seemed to really take a liking to me. I've always thought he was pretty cute but honestly had never considered much else. He's a nice guy though so who knows. Of course living in florida doesn't help the situation much but whatever.
Sunday was fun as well. We went back out and tied off next to Dwayne again. I drank a bit too much as I ended up vomitting everywhere. :( luckily everyone took really good care of me. I met this guy Rob brought with him that I had met on manhunt a few weeks ago but didn't recognize him. he's cute but I didn't get much of a chance to talk to him so I got his sn today and hopefully I can get to know him. seemed like a nice guy.
well, that's about all the update I have for now. I'm about to go to bed cuz I'm still pretty exhausted from the weekend. Peace out!
I had a great time hanging out with Kris, and matt seemed to really take a liking to me. I've always thought he was pretty cute but honestly had never considered much else. He's a nice guy though so who knows. Of course living in florida doesn't help the situation much but whatever.
Sunday was fun as well. We went back out and tied off next to Dwayne again. I drank a bit too much as I ended up vomitting everywhere. :( luckily everyone took really good care of me. I met this guy Rob brought with him that I had met on manhunt a few weeks ago but didn't recognize him. he's cute but I didn't get much of a chance to talk to him so I got his sn today and hopefully I can get to know him. seemed like a nice guy.
well, that's about all the update I have for now. I'm about to go to bed cuz I'm still pretty exhausted from the weekend. Peace out!
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